Aunt Ida

I am "a woman who's lived fifty-seven years and worn resentment like a medicine charm for forty. If I were to live my life differently, I would start with the word No: first to him, my father; to Clara, then to Willard, before they left me; to Lee, to save his life. I was different with Christine, but it turned out no better." In my stubborn isolation, I distorted the truth that in the end it was me who rejected Clara and Willard Pretty Dog, not vice-versa. I know many of the family secrets that have torn us apart for all these years. I am Christine's mother, although everyone (even Christine) calls me Aunt Ida at my request, so that I could protect myself from disappointment if Christine's real mother, Clara, ever came back to claim her child. When Clara returned four years after Christine was born and calls herself Christine's mother, I was so shocked that I instinctively brought my fingers, which were carrying a hot teakettle, to my ears, thereby burning a plum-sized hole on my cheek that serves as a permanent reminder of my secret burden. Clara wanted to give up Christine for adoption. To block her, I had arranged for Father Hurlburt to get a birth certificate that declared myself as Christine's legal mother. To seal Clara's fate, I threatens to reveal the truth about Clara's relationship to Lecon (my father).
I always doted on Lee, who was my illegitimate son by Willard, and so Christine often felt rejected. I decides to bring up Lee myself, just as I had brought up Christine, never revealing his true father. I persuaded myself that when I was with a man I always "pretended to be stupid" and that I wanted Christine "to see me smart, to know she could be that way herself in front of any man." My intelligence as I grew older is clear, for I successfully leased part of my land to make improvements in my own life. I have suffered a lot over the years; but by the same token i have perhaps earned the greatest portion of happiness, however small, having raised three children, to varying degrees, on my own and having achieved some financial stability in my life.